Here it comes- the stomach bug is making its way around your kid’s school, and the school nurse just called to ask you to pick your child up. There’s only one thing you can do. Well, two things. You can either keep your sense of humor, or go under for the third time.
Brace for impact
Make sure you stock up on Netflix, saltines, children’s analgesics, pedialyte pops, laundry detergent, jello, and chicken soup. Or, you know, just get Oreos and Burritos and hope for the best. I’m not judging you. (Oh, and let me add Pepto Bismol to the list- for you, after you catch whatever your kid has.)
Netflix is Crucial
When you are up all night, Netflix and a bucket are your best friend. You might consider signing up right now and then cancelling next week, if you aren’t a regular recipient of streaming video. Because the puker might not mind the 2 am infomercial for the Bowflex, but you will want to run screaming from the room.
Take Full Advantage of the time off school
This is an excellent opportunity to expand your child’s horizons. Personally, I tried to interest mine in K-9 and the Tom Baker years, but we ended up watching Star Wars four times instead. After careful thought, I have arrived at these insights: Carrie Fisher didn’t wear a bra, and Luke was kind of a whiner. Ian wants an R2 unit for his birthday.
Bring a Book
When you take your kid to the pediatrician so you can be reassured by the standard “just a virus, should pass in a few days” which translates to NOT MENINGITIS YAY, you may be there for a while. The TV in the waiting room will no doubt seem like the 8th wonder of the world to your kid, especially if it’s playing the forbidden SPONGE BOB SQUARE PANTS, but you might want to keep your mind from going numb by bringing a book. Unless you’ve started to come down with the bug yourself, in which case HE LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA might be just your speed.
Other Notes
Don’t worry, once you steam that carpet it will be totally fine. And remember: this too shall pass.
wow…this is a great list and the one I would be bookmarking for future references when my son starts school this September 🙂